n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness—an epic story that continues invisibly around you like an anthill sprawling deep underground, with elaborate passageways to thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might appear only once, as an extra sipping coffee in the background, as a blur of traffic passing on the highway, as a lighted window at dusk.
"I can’t do this anymore, Sir." he said.
"Barton you need to get a hold of yourself. She died. She’s gone. In our line of work this happens every—"
"This is different. This is fucking different and you know it.
…I can’t eat. I can’t sleep because every time I close my fucking eyes all I see is her. All I see is her and all I want is for her to come back and…Jesus, I can’t do this.
I can’t do this without her.”